Disclaimer: If lost, please do not attempt. Except for 6, always use 6.
- You can determine which direction is north by asking someone.
Failing that, float a stick on a still body of water. North will
be the direction that is opposite of south.
- Use your shoes as mittens if your hands are cold. If your feet get
cold, maybe you should think twice about getting lost in a forest.
- If you’re injured, may as well sever the limb. It’ll make for
a cool story when you get home anyway, plus you qualify for
handicapped parking, too.
- You can determine if a mushroom is safe to eat by trying a bit. If
your stomach feels like fire, don’t
eat any more.
- If you encounter a grizzly bear, attempt to punch it in the eye.
This will not scare the bear off, but you’re dead anyway.
- Use your handy, nature approved paracord bracelet. This will save your life, seriously.
 |
| He didn't have a paracord bracelet. |
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